Tis the season, please stop giving me food, no, really I must insist, okay fine I’ll take it…

Ah it’s the holidays!  Which means office parties and food and mall Santas and of course gifts and shopping.  For me due to my job (I work for an auto insurance company as a liability adjuster) it also means having to tell people that they’re either at fault for hitting someone else or they’re not at fault and drowning in claims involving snow and ice.  It means that as much as I try it’s hard for me to actually relax and enjoy the holidays because I’m desperately trying to call people while they’re out shopping and asking them to tell me about their wreck. Then I come home and I get to send out Christmas cards and gifts to family and friends who live in our old home state or across the country and then it’s time spent buying gifts for kidlet and keeping to her routine.  

Then there’s the food, everyone is baking and eating and I’m already fat, I don’t need more to eat, no I don’t need to try your grandma’s fudge.  I’m sure she’s a lovely person and I’m sure her fudge is heavenly but have you looked at me lately?  Do I look like someone who needs to be eating fudge?  NO, I really do not and oh what’s this, you have Gingerbread cookies and you heard they were my favorite, yes, they are my favorite, but no really, I’m good, I ate one earlier.  Oh, of course I’ll buy a cake that will straight to my thighs and costs twice as much as it’s worth, it’s for a good cause what with fundraising for the school.  Oh, no, really, I don’t need to take this tin of cookies, please it’s just me, my husband, and my little one and we couldn’t possibly eat-okay, thank you I’ll take them home, please don’t get upset and teary eyed it’s Christmas and I’m sure they’re delicious.  Thank you so much for thinking of us and my ever expanding waistline.  I will of course attend the office holiday lunch, it would be so rude not to and being new in this job I need to be sure I’m making a good impression and I will take seconds yes please…

That’s why by the end of the day all I want is a glass of wine or a cold beer and to lob a hideous fruit cake at the upstairs neighbor who makes a tremendous amount of noise at 2 am or the neighbor across from us with their mean little yappy dog who scares my daughter or the driver who cuts me off in traffic with no turn signal or the lady who pushes me out of the way in the store to get the best deal on her gifts.  I keep reminding myself that it isn’t about food or gifts or cards, it’s about the memories we make with our loved ones.  It’s about the memories my husband and I will make with our daughter.  Kidlet is 2 this year and she’s starting to grasp that the boxes wrapped up under the tree are for her and for Daddy and Mommy and there’s that twinkle in her eye and her face lights up when she sees the Christmas tree or the neighbor’s Christmas lights.  I keep reminding myself that no matter what happens I have an amazing and awesome husband whom I adore and this adorable tiny human who loves me and depends on me and I will do anything for them.

Even if it means eating that fruitcake. 

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About redneckmeetsgeek

I'm a Redneck Girl who met a Geek Boy, we married, we had a kidlet, we moved away from friends and family and everything we ever knew to the PNW, then we had another kidlet, and lived happily ever after.....most days, also I'm convinced that Martha Stewart secretly hates me
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